+i am exhausted...and i don't wanna do anything+

no pictures for today...
i just lazy to upload it...
the stressy feeling comes again...
and i dunno why...
haix...
i just suddenly feel like this when i walk out from the borders...
i mean...
i have a great time in borders...
i like books...
i can spend my whole day just stay in there and walk around exploring books...
the problem is when i walk out of the shop...
and my cousins and sisters start chit chating along...
about their personal life...
i just dunni what to say or how to respond...
i don't like it when they talk about it...
and so i just keep my mouth shut...
and eat my fries...
i just dunno why...
i admit...
that i am quite shu when they talk about this...
and i just don't really have many male friends...
but i just wish that they don't talk about this in front of me...
and the stuffs they said...
just kept remind me of something i don't wanna remember...
about what my mom said to me...
and make me feel so lost...
and i don't wanna remember every single thing about what happen that day...
about my weird personalities...
and didn't have great relationship with my cousins...
by looking on what they are talking...
i know...
that i do not belong in there...
keep telling me to communicate with them seems inpossible...
and yet keep forcing me...
to do the stuffs i don't like...
and lately there's this health problem...
makes me feel even worse...
i dunno what is happening...
i really don't know...